Fallout Shelter Status Report

Despite there being not much to it, I have been playing Fallout Shelter for a solid month now. It is frightening how much time I have wasted on it.

Since we last spoke a lot has happened in the game. First, I got to 200 Vault Dwellers! Second…well, actually that’s pretty much it. I got more inhabitants and gave them dumb names and occasionally found something interesting (a new outfit) in the wasteland.

200 is the maximum occupancy, which means if I want more people, some are going to have to go. In fact, I have some ladies who are stuck being pregnant forever because I can’t have any more people in the vault. In theory I could just knock up every woman in the vault and then have the men leave one by one, to be replaced by more pregnant women. That’s kind of creepy, Bethesda.

The most fun I’ve had is with this citizen:

Your Mom came in from the wasteland, and trained up her Perception to 10. Then Your Mom went to work in a Water Processing Plant. In that picture she’s talking to Dave Lartigue, who she then had sex with.

I was trying to breed citizens for special traits, like putting two people with 10 Strength together to make a super strong baby, but that didn’t really work very well. These days I mainly use sex for increasing the happiness in my vault. When I feel like the people need to be happier, I make two of the unhappy people knock boots together, which cheers them up.

When I’m not forcing people to have sex and naming citizens juvenile names, I’m trying for better stuff. I don’t really need better stuff, as my vault runs pretty well and I have a reliable crew of wasteland runners. Still, I’ve only gotten one of the rare dwellers and I want more.

I’ve bought six of the lunchboxes you can pay real money for. One was just to throw some cash their way and then they had a sale where I bought a bunch of five. Other than that they’ve all come from achieving goals. I did get the absolute worst lunchbox, though. It contained one stimpak (I generate about 6 of these every minute or so), some water, an outfit I had scads of, and a rare item: a gun that does 2-5 damage. I throw away any gun that does less than six, and that’s starting to become 7 and 8.

Here’s my vault as it stands now. It can’t even all fit on the screen.

There are a lot of people just wandering around or hanging out in the dorms because there’s nothing really for them to do. I suppose I could build more rooms for them to work in, but all the work is currently being done just fine. I wish there were some other rooms I could build for them, things you actually see in the games like an atrium, movie rooms, and such. I want my guys to do more than work, train, and have sex.

While I’m wishing for stuff, I also think it would be cool if you could get things for your vault like a Mr. Handy or a Protectron or a dog. Maybe since the game is more popular than they expected such things will eventually come.

I guess I’ll keep my main vault going in the hopes of scoring more rare dwellers. That going to mean some people have to be thrown out the door. Before that starts happening, here’s the current roll call:

#*$@&!; 3.14159; A Tower of Scorpions; Acorn Head; Aggressive Rodent; Agua Frijole; Alfred Beast; Angel Love; Anton Chekov; Asbestos Jackson; Assistant Manager; Avenging Hathaway; Ba’al; Banksy; Beefaroni Murray; Beefcreep Newton; Bert Brandon; Bittercup; Bling Bling; Boo I’m a Ghost; Booty Rumper; Bubble Yum; Bug Eater; Calamine Lotion; Caligula; Cap’n Dad; Cave Canum; Charlie Angel; Charmander; Chocalatey Delicious; Cindi Mayweather; Clawhammer; Clowny C. Clown; Crawdad Hicks; Crazy Phil; Creepshow Newton; Cronk Flonker; DJ Facey-Face; Dave Lartigue; Deborah Bo Beborah; Diphenhydramine; Dodgy Sam; Dogmeat; Dot Matrix; Dr. Bosco, PhD; Dr. Legcramp; Drowning Victim; Dumpster Goblin; El Lucha Hombre K; Evil Twin; Extra Crispy; Fancy Pants; Fistoplex; Flux Anchovy; Freedom Rock; Friend to Children; Fussy Eater; Gentleman Davis; Glamdring; Glorpox of Regulus V; Goatboy; God-Emperor of Dune; Godzilla Fisher; Grosse Tête; Gruff Grumbles; Hammerhead Brooks; Hands-Free Jones; Hangnail; Hashtag Winning; He-Man Winning; Hello, Miss?; Hellyeah Express; Higgs Boson; Hipster Baby; Hobo Joe; Home Fries; Honda Civic; Hope Jobscash; Iambic Pentameter; Ice Cream Man; Interesting Billy; It’s Toasted!; Jell-o Man; Jenny From The Vault; Johnny Two-Times; Jupiter Q. Proton; Kewpie Doll; King Vitamin; Kirby Dots; LOL Legcramp; La Llorona; Lady J.A.N.E.; Lass Girl; Lawn Cloud; Lego Minifig; Li’l Boo Price; Lisa Cuppatissa; Livingston Frost; Loomis, the Rat King; Lord Hunkmeat; Lugnut Grant; Magnetic Dog Boy; Mairzie Doats; Major Tom; Master of Bees; Maxwell’s Demon; Mc Joing Boing; Merseinne Prime; Miss Nuka Cola 2268; Miss Thang; Molly Waka; Mookie Wilson; Mophead; Mothgirl; Mr. Caa; Mrs. Mystery; Muad’Dib; Munka Face; No Problemo; Nobody Likes Tom; Noodles; Not David Bowie; Number 115; Oasis Liker; Oedipa Maas; Ol’ Beanstalk; Old Man Baby; Orange Crush; Paaaaaang; Party Angela; Pascal Fortran; Patient Zero; Pentagon Man; Ppppp Hernandez; Princess Wondra; Professor Junior; Pugg Dogg; Pure Energy; Queen Rex; REO Speedwagon; Recessive Jean; Sacajawia; Sad Tony; Sadtrombone Henrique; Secretary of Defense; Sex Pope; Sexxxtra Grant; Shasta Newton; Sip Hole; Sister Laser; Soap Boy; Some Jerk; Space Filler; Spap Oop; Sparkplug McGee; Spongebath; Stegosaurus Rex; Sutekh the Destroyer; Swamp Thing; Taco Doritos; Taters Precious; Taylor Swift; The Beard That Walks; The Chuzz; The Combover Kid; The Foretold; The Freshmaker; The Grape Avenger; The Mayor; The Transponster; The Unknowable; Thrust Flexpound; Thumbless Larry; Tiny Hitler; Todd; Tornado Alley; Toxic Wombat; Trig Star; Trudy; Turbo Blast; Twinklepixie; Um Actually; Uncle Grease; Underdog Newton; Unfrozen Cavewoman; Unit BX-52a; Utinni; Valkyrie Amazon; Vazzensnare; Wasteland Strangler; Whispers of Night; Wolfman Greg; Womp-Womp Phillips; X-Ray Eyes; Yada Yada; Your Mom; Zazz Murray; Zippy Zowie; Zoom Zoom; [Name TBA]

A few notes on some of them:

Iambic Pentameter was resident #200.

Bittercup is a rare dweller. That’s the name she comes with.

Avenging Hathaway, Bittercup, Caligula, Dave Lartigue, El Lucha Hombre K, Jenny From The Vault, King Vitamin, Mookie Wilson, Ppppp Hernandez, Sex Pope, Sutekh the Destroyer, The Unknowable, and Zazz Murray are my regular wasteland explorers, with Ppppp being the best one.

El Lucha Hombre K was named for Kyle Starks. Previously he was El Perro Negro.

God-Emperor of Dune is in the process of getting trained up to 10 in all stats.

Number 115 was, in fact, citizen #115.

I have the reinforced vault door, which does nothing except make raider attacks take longer. If no one is currently guarding the door, Lego Minifig and Merseinne Prime come up from their power plant to take care of invaders. Should raider make it past them, they go into the Diner of Doom, where everyone is outfitted with top weapons.

Yes, I know I spelled “Sacajawea” wrong. I need to fix that.

DJ Facey-Face is Taylor Swift’s son. I don’t remember who his dad is because I changed that guy’s name.

Oops I misspelled “Mersenne Prime” as well.

Here’s Dave Lartigue without his power armor on.

I have an incredibly nerdy idea for a second vault, but man, I dunno if I need another one, given how much time I’ve wasted on just this one.

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