Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid.

It seems that Bushco and its subsidiary, Blair Industries, are upset that their constant terror alerts are greeted with titters and eye-rolling rather than white-knuckled intensity.

I can’t believe they’re surprised. How many of these vague warnings are we supposed to encounter and still remain at full intensity?

It doesn’t help when there appears to be a statistical correlation between Bush’s poll numbers and terror alerts. Or when we need to get something off the front page.

It also doesn’t help when new alerts are revealed to be based off years-old data.

But this really drives the point home:

Slowdown in ‘chatter’ worries officials

If there’s an increase in ‘chatter’, it’s bad. If there’s a decrease, it’s bad. I’m assuming a constant level could also be considered bad.

There is a simple way to defeat terrorism: don’t show fear. If someone attempts to use fear as a weapon, not being afraid kind of puts the kibosh on that. Now, of course, you don’t act stupid, but you also don’t wander around in a panic. If you do that then, as the saying goes, the terrorists have won.

George Bush doesn’t agree with that approach because, as I’ve stated before, he’s a terrorist. That is, he wishes to use fear to achieve a political means. For him to succeed, it’s vitally important that everyone remain afraid. He’s staked everything on this shadowy threat, and if we stop believing in the shadowy threat, he’s got nothing. His strategy is Grand Moff Tarkin’s: using fear to keep the local systems in line. Except instead of building an actual Death Star, he just tells stories of the possibility of Death Stars.

Some may argue that it’s due to this constant “vigilance” that we’ve avoided another 9/11. We don’t have any way of knowing whether or not that’s the case. There’s no Cosmic Treadmill to take us to an alternate Earth where lowering our guard by not constantly yelling “Terror Threat!” has resulted in a massive loss of lives. It’s more likely, however, that if indeed such things have been prevented, it’s more due to behind-the-scenes actions like, say, actually paying attention to information that a plot is happening.

We’re supposed to be acting strong and resolute in the face of adversity, so why are we expected to cringe every time someone says “Boo”? We should be happily going about our lives, defying efforts to make us scared instead of chewing our nails on airplanes because there are scary people on board. Suddenly it’s un-American not to act constantly afraid.

I’m sorry, Mr. Bush, if we’re not going to play along. I’m not afraid of Al-Qaeda. I am afraid of you and your lying thugs, but there’s something I can do about you. I’m voting your asses back onto the street. If you’re so damn successful at routing terrorism, why are we having these constant alerts? Why are we asked to be afraid all the time? Your followers are more than welcome to lock themselves in closets and shake, but I’m not going to do it. We liberals are supposed to be the cowardly ones, but you sure seem to have turned the tables on that!

Boo!

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