Oscar Grouch

“Hello, 911? I’d like to report a robbery. The victim is Paul Giamatti, and he was robbed of an Oscar nomination for best actor for his role in Sideways!”

I’m really only kidding there. I liked Paul and Sideways well enough, but I got no dog in this year’s Oscars. Nothing there I care enough about to root for, though I am glad that Eternal Sunshine of the Overrated Movie didn’t get as many nods as I thought it would. “Mister Carrey, can we please give you an award for having the restraint to not talk out of your ass for two hours? Please?” I also thought it was interesting that despite its own ghetto category, The Polar Express still didn’t get a nod.

Here’s my real question. I assume, from how often Hollywood addresses the subject, that someone out there is immensely fascinated by boxing. I’ve never been that person. I’ve never known that person. Nobody I’ve asked has ever known that person. So who the hell are all these damn boxing movies for? Last night at dinner Mary suggested (which Becky had previously suggested to me) that it was all the hoo-hah of a sports movie, but without having to focus on a team, and I think that probably nails it. In other words, you can still have a damn Triumph of the Human Spirit story but it’s about sports. Hooray. Far as I’m concerned, a fantastic boxing movie is like a beautiful painting of a cold sore.

So out of all the major movies being feted, Sideways is the only one I’ve seen. I wouldn’t mind seeing Collateral, but the rest of them can get bent.

If you’re interested in reading opinions on the Oscars by someone who gives a damn, you could do far worse than checking out Tom the Dog’s blog.

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