There Are Also Three or Four Comics that Don’t Feature Bruce Campbell

What’s hot this month in Previews? Why, a 20 year old comic! And what’s on the back cover? A comic based on a twenty-six year old movie! Is there a message to be gleaned from this?

Serenity Lunch Boxes (p. 49) — At last, Serenity fans have a solution to the problem of being beaten up for their lunch money!

The Spirit #14 (p. 87) — Aragones and Evanier writing this now? Intriguing!

Showcase Presents: Superman Family vol 2 (p. 94) — I’ll be getting this even though volume one contained life-threatening levels of Jimmy Olsen.

“Grandpa, tell me about the mythical comic book again!”
“Okay, honeybunch. See, for years and years there have been legends of a comic book called Jack Staff, but despite the occasional alleged picture of a cover in Previews, no one has actually seen a printed copy of the comic in years, if ever. And yet, there are still those — like me, for example — who believe that the comic is out there, and will some day emerge to prove the doubters wrong.”
“Grandpa, you’re insane.”
“Yes I am, honeybunch. Yes I am.”

Jack Staff Special #1 (p.140) — You’ll see, naysayers, you’ll see! They said Biff Bam Pow would never come out either!

Rod Espinosa’s Prince of Heroes #1 (p. 201) — Okay, make fun of me for wanting an Antarctic Press book if you must, but I really liked The Courageous Princess and Neotopia!

Omega One #1 (p. 222) — “This completely painted book takes heroes and villains from Ant and other books and forces them to work together for the government to destroy a WWD — Weapon of Worldwide Destruction. A surprise guest star makes an appearance!”

Wait! Wait for the punchline!

“MATURE THEMES”

AHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

The Atheist TPB (p. 252) — As an Atheist and fan of Phil Hester’s, let me just say, this book is not good.

Doctor Who #1 (p. 281) — I’m not crazy about the art, but at least the writer is someone who’s worked on the show. I’ll be getting this, for better or worse, though…man…IDW

Wasteland #14 (p. 298) — Woo!

Sex, Drugs, and Violence in the Comics (p. 307) — It’s pricey, so this one might not make the cut, but a bunch of pre-code crime stories? That’s entertainment!

Atomic Robo #4 (p. 310) — If you like Hellboy, you should definitely check this out. The first issue was loads of fun, and I’m eagerly awaiting the subsequent ones.

You’ll understand that no further joke is needed when I say that page 348 features a new Manga about masturbation.

Torchwood Magazine (p. 359) — Don’t worry, Torchwood fans. They’re working on lunchboxes for you two as well.

And I’m sorry guys, I just don’t have the intestinal fortitude to make it through the models, busts, action figures, t-shirts, and other crap this month. Cold and flu season is approaching, and I have to keep my resistance up.

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