A Name for My Pain

Fans of this blog and my brain will remember that I am the proud owner of what appears to be a cyst in my right sinus cavity. (It’s not actually in my brain, as some folks misunderstood.)

My appointment with the ENT doctor isn’t until Monday, but in the meantime I decided to get a second opinion from Andrew, who consulted his medical book:

The Tome of Corruption for the Warhammer Fantasy RPG.

He believes he has identified the object in the MRI. From page 41, in the descriptions of the Ruinous Powers:

Intelligent Cyst (Fear 2): A horrid cyst grows inside of you. Unlike Chaos Organs, this growth is intelligent.

The cyst has its own motives and goals, and it tries to take control of you from time to time. Each day, make a Will Power Test. If you fail the test, the Intelligent Cyst takes control of your body. On the following day, you may attempt a new Will Power Test to re-establish control, though if you fail, you lose another day. While the cyst is in control, you have no sense of what’s happening to your body, though the effects are sometimes later clear.

Should you be slain, the Intelligent Cyst explodes from your body, sprouts limbs and waddles around as a new Chaos Spawn.

So there’s a possibility that THAT’S what’s going on in my nose. What’s worse, a big wad of snot or a big wad of intelligent chaos? I suppose I’ll find out on Monday. If it’s the latter I really hope they remove it. Though, would the new Chaos Spawn be considered a dependent? Would I have to send it through college? Could I claim it on my taxes? I don’t know enough about Warhammer FRP to know for sure.

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5 Responses to A Name for My Pain

  1. Andrew Weiss says:

    Chaos spawn usually can fend for themselves or get adopted by tribes of beastmen, so I wouldn’t fear for your 401K.

  2. Kitty says:

    I think you need a competition to name the cyst! We would come up with some delightful names.

  3. Dave says:

    Perhaps the winner could get it if it gets removed!

  4. esthela says:

    You and your friends are some of the goofiest people I psuedo know :)

  5. joncormier says:

    Just don’t go to Antartica with Kurt Russel. That won’t end well.